At the end of our events, we make a point of quietly standing near the doors as people are departing. We like to say “goodbye,” “safe travels,” and “thank you for coming.” Frequently, some audience members linger to chat a little longer.
After a performance in central Wisconsin, a 50-something-year-old woman who had been an enthusiastic participant in the facilitated conversation came up to me and said, “Yes, it’s really hard to be a caregiver for my mother, but what has made it even worse — sometimes it seems impossible — is that 15 months ago I lost my husband quite suddenly to a fast-moving case of pancreatic cancer. I know we could have done this together! I miss him so much and we could have done this.”
I find myself tearing up again just writing these words. It is easy to use the term “family caregiver” and it is really important for us all to remember that all family caregivers have their own specific and very personal life journeys going on. The compassion we show and the ways we can make our communities dementia capable matter more than so many of us will ever know. My hope is that The Remember Project will always help us open our hearts to help our neighbors, friends, and family members in new ways and that we can work together to make sure that a person living with dementia will have the biggest life they can for as long as they can.
